When I fled in my van with my children, I had nothing. Over the previous 14 years, I had been prevented from accessing cash and writing checks. I was limited to the use of one credit card for all our needs. I was called in to stand before him once a month to account for... Continue Reading →
I'd cried myself to sleep the night of our wedding, having been refused The next morning, I awoke to his hand on my left hip. "Take off all your clothes; I'm going to consummate this now." Shocked, confused, and dismayed, I obeyed. I didn’t feel like I had a choice. A few months later, after being... Continue Reading →
I sat very still listening as he droned on into the third hour of lecture. I knew that if I spoke up, talked back, argued, offered an original thought, or looked bored, he'd keep it up for hours. The potential that he'd keep me awake all night was high. I was exhausted but determined to... Continue Reading →
This could not be more accurate or better written. We must be consistent in our support of victims regardless of political party issues.
A friend recently tagged me in a Facebook post that attempted to discredit Tara Reade, the woman who has accused presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden of sexual assault. You can read that post in its entirety here. What follows is my response. Please note that my interest here is neither to defend nor to discredit any particular politician or political party. Rather, my concern is for victims of abuse of all political persuasions who are attacked, slandered, and shamed whenever they come forward against people in positions of power and influence. It is disheartening that both major political parties exploit abuse accusations against their political rivals, but are willing to ignore them against their political allies. Truth and justice, not political expediency, should be our motivation when dealing with accusations of abuse. It is to that end that I have written this response.
I’ve hesitated to weigh in…
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It was valentines day. I was ecstatic about the gift I was going to give my husband. We loved Disney and visited the parks 2x per year. During one of our visits, we had splurged on a gorgeous Disney print. It had been in our closet for over a year, and this valentines day I... Continue Reading →
My first sexual assault happened when I was 5 or 6 or 7. I can't remember my age. I guess that means I'm lying. I was confused and scared and I didn't even have the words to describe what had just happened so I didn't tell. I guess that means I'm lying.... Continue Reading →
I love learning! So recently, when I was made aware of some changes that have happened in the advocacy field of domestic violence, I got really excited to share it with you! As a survivor, and then as an advocate, one of the first things I learned about was the cycle of violence. I think... Continue Reading →
I didn't rewind the videotape. I made supper, fed the children, cleaned up then sat at the table to eat my meal. He wanted to watch a movie. This was back before DVD's were popular. Our daughter had been watching Thomas the Tank Engine all week long and we kept replaying the same movie... Continue Reading →
Healing takes time. 8 years later, I still find myself discovering new patterns to the abuse I endured for 15 years. I often go back and reread some of the blog posts I've written here. Sometimes I can improve on them, update them or just revisit my thoughts while I was writing them. I... Continue Reading →
Listening to "ON POINT" from NPR. My friend Julie Owens is the professional being interviewed this morning. One of the BEST interviews about Domestic Abuse I've ever heard!!! http://www.wbur.org/onpoint/2018/05/11/the-complexities-behind-domestic-violence